Lifestyle Notes

The hardest part of trying to make a healthy lifestyle my permanent lifestyle is how to recover from the crazy weekends.  After a weekend at home for my bridal shower and a weekend in the big apple for my bachelorette party – this girl’s diet/exercise regiment was on life support.  I was working out when I was at home, but long weekends away and trying to catch up on some sleep meant a 3 day break and a 4 day break – much different than the 6 days of exercise a week I was maintaining before.  And of course, being on the road meant that I wasn’t eating nearly as clean as I had been.

So what’s a girl to do?

Well for one, she should do the opposite of what she usually does when life happens.  I usually panic, freak out, assume I’m now 20 lbs heavier and a failure and then spend 4 days kicking myself in the butt before going hardcore again.  But now, now that I’m really trying to make health a lifestyle and not a diet, I’m doing something totally different.  This time I:

1. Took an extra rest day because my weekend left me with a completely empty tank and in desperate need of sleep.  So I slept in on Monday and enjoyed that extra sweet hour of sleep.
2. I didn’t force it on Monday.  I drank more water, but I also indulged my need for caffeine and a little more grease.  I actually think that I spent Sunday still quasi drunk – which is why my hangover was super delayed.  The joys of getting old – you cannot party like a rockstar.  At least I can’t. Then I laid around the house all night feeling like crap still.
3. Woke up today and worked out.  Nothing extreme.  Instead of Fire 55, which was on the schedule, I did Fire 45 which is one of my favorite workout DVDs ever.  Sometimes when you need motivation, don’t go for stupidly hardcore, go for something you actually want to do.
4. After my awesome sweat session, had my vitamins and a protein shake.  Packed a healthy day of food for work and headed out the door.  My body feels ready to get back on track today, so I’m giving it what it wants – clean healthy protein and whole grain carbs.  And some veggies because well – I need them

And while that sounds obvious – duh – that is NOT what I have ever done before.  I’ve never recovered this great from a weekend of doing nothing I’m supposed to do healthwise.  I’ve always done the freak out and wasted a week or two in shame.  Then turned it on SO hard core that it was not maintainable for the long run.  I know I’m not the only person who suffers from this kind of guilt because I have a lot of friends I talk to who do the same thing.

But the thing is, if being healthy is a lifestyle, you have to start learning to deal with the “life” part of it.  There will be parties, girls weekends, tired weekends, and days where you just want a freaking Chick-fil-A chicken sandwich.  And in order to be someone who maintains their diet – you can’t just say I’m never eating (enter food here) or i’m going to always exercise (enter days of week here) for the rest of my life.  Because that all or nothing mentality is how we set ourselves up for failure.  Instead of striving for perfection, we have to learn to strive for maintainable peace.

I’m not saying I have it done and I’m “cured” of my diet tendencies – is one ever?  But I am saying I’m damn proud that for once, I did the right thing.  And I’m hoping that I can remember how good it feels to not freak out over it so the next time life happens – I can do the right thing again.

What Momma Never Told You About Underthings

This may be a little TMI…but seriously…I need some advice from my fellow womenfolk.

In my ever present attempt to be a lady instead of a slob, I found the cutest Ralph Lauren dress on clearance the other day and snatched it up.  Per some of my other purchases, the fact that it fit in a size 18W made it an automatic buy.  Any rate, it’s cute and has that kind of stick to ya material that is really nice to dress up or down, so I figured it would make a cute addition to the wardrobe for a mean $23.

And because I thought it was so cut and not expensive, I am wearing it today   I put it on with a pair of regular undies (instead of my super dooper hold em in high ones) and my bra with long bottom that is supposed to hold all the stomach in.  I may have lost some weight, but I haven’t lost it all, and some assistance was needed.  Now, I’ve never worn this long bottom (someone please tell me what the right name for this thing is…it has no hooks…just like a tank top with a bra top that is tight), but it seemed to fit just fine.  And I bought it quite a few lbs ago – so no reason it wouldn’t fit today, right?

After wearing this thing now for 3.5 hours, I want to take it off and run over it with my car.  It’s doing that roll thing.  Now, I know someone is going to say that the roll thing means it’s too small.  Well then, how are these things supposed to fit b/c the size up was so big it was loose on me.  I didn’t need a loose fit, I need something that was going to hold it together.  Is this b/c it’s a one piece (no snaps) or just this design?  Is this why women 50 years ago wore those belts and whistles every day – to hold this crap down to the waist?  Is this why I don’t wear dresses?

I have another one, it’s just supposed to go over the stomach and you wear your own regular underwear with it.  I haven’t worn that one yet, but is that the one that is supposed to work?  And how do you try these things on…because it works fine for a while, it’s not until you wear it for sometime that it just does not work anymore.

Help me…before I literally go to target and wrap myself in ace bandage under this dress because that’s how bad this is today….

Being a Diva – Kim’s Version

The challenge to keep myself together is going GREAT!!!  I will post a little collage of pictures this week – but so far, aside from ONE day, I’ve done really really well   I had one day where I wanted to be a bum, but I’ve stuck to my vow of only wearing my gross Clark comfy kicks only when I am doing house stuff.  I haven’t worn my contacts nearly as much as I wanted to – but I was at home in Michigan and couldn’t find my case and in desperation of having worn them for 12 hours at that point – took them out w/ water and threw them away.  Then found my case the next morning.  Brilliant.

No worries though, progress is about small steps.  Weight loss, getting healthy, being a better person – all things that need to be done in small steps.  And I have thought long and hard about getting myself together every day this week – a small miracle.  Today, I’m even wearing heels!  Not heels that a Kardashian sister would approve of, but little 1.5 inch kitten heels that are blue and match my shirt.  That’s a huge thing for me and my wear black shoes every day no matter the occasion self.  I also have been wearing earrings and a necklace most days.  Sometimes even bracelets!

I think the most important, most wonderful thing about these changes are that I still feel like Kim.  I’ve done nothing that is so uncomfortable that I feel like it’s not sustainable.  I do try to do at least my eyebrows and lip gloss/color every day.  At least for now to build up the habit of putting on a little makeup.  But again, nothing so far has felt like it’s an act or that I’m putting on airs that I can’t maintain.  I think this is how I can make this stick.

And another major accomplishment – I found cute clothes to travel in that were COMFORTABLE!!!  Not that flying home is a long flight (it’s literally an hour from take off to landing), but still, it’s a time for sleeping, so I like to be comfy.  I wore jeans, but jazzed up the outfit with cute flats and shoes.  And of course, some cute earrings (small) and a jacket to sleep in/on

What tips do you have to be fashionable and classy instead of sloppy – while staying comfortable and true to you?

It Is Time.

I read a blog post today on The Clothes Make the Girl that linked to a blog post that changed my life.  Okay not really changed my life, but gave me a serious wake up call.  This post by Live Fit and Sore called Reflections on Letting Yourself Go was a big smack in the face.

Now, I do dress fairly smartly to work.  Most days.  When I wake up on time.  And do my hair.  And don’t throw on whatever.  I actually made the effort to buy a few new items in my new size (20W biotches….I’m seriously contemplating having a bonfire with my size 26s…but that’s for a different post I suppose) so I don’t look like I’m wearing somebody else’s clothes.  But anyway, for sure when I’m not working and just relaxing that I tend to let my inner couch surfing slob come out.

This post is a not so gentle reminder that you know what – we are worth the time.  She’s not talking about spending hundreds of dollars on new fancy stuff.  But working what you have and if you don’t have anything but sweats…maybe investing a little on some inexpensive upgrades (she’s talking Target people…totally doable).   And it’s the little things.  Throw on a cute tee with some jeans that actually fit with a fabulous shoe and bag – and  you look like  you took hours instead of minutes.  Accessorizing is the key to looking put together and you can collect cool accessories for most anywhere.  I definitely have some that cost a lot, some that cost a little, and some that were handmade.  It’s all about just the time.  The post on Live Fit and Sore was inspired by a post Piperlime put on their facebook with this image:

Now as a fan of the 50s and 60s…(I’d love if Mode Merr would give my closet a makeover!)…a time where ladies really looked fabulous every day – how can I argue with that?? So I’m taking myself on a personal challenge that for the next 30 days, I will make a pledge to dress nicely every day.  I don’t mean expensively or in dresses or anything.  Just put some thought into my clothing, leave the sweatpants/t-shirt/old flops combo at home, and maybe spend my last bit of time as a non-married woman looking like I give a shit about myself.   Maybe use some eyeliner and wear my freaking contacts instead of the glasses which I really don’t necessarily think look all that great on me…but they are easy and I’m lazy.   I think I can do it…anyone in to join me?  I may actually try to post some photos just so there is an external force witnessing me trying to act like an effing lady lol.

It’s about the Marriage.

The funny thing about planning a wedding is that everyone thinks they should be invited and should help you plan.  Okay not everyone.  But 90% of the women around you do.  Some of them are small little things that are said in fun, but because of the 987523 large things that were said in all seriousness – it makes it hard to split the difference.  I really try not to sweat the small stuff, but in the last few weeks we have before the wedding, the annoying comments have hit an all time high.  I almost let them get to me, almost let them annoy me to no end.  Because at least 10 people have asked me about the weather, the seating, the food, or other things that I have never ever in my life thought to ask someone getting married.  Now I understand why I was told to delegate and turn my phone off the morning of the wedding – because if they can ask it, they will, lol.  It’s like when a wedding happens, people forget that it’s JUST A FREAKING PARTY!!  I actually have had a few people ask me if their outfits were okay.  Not because they wanted to wear a belly dance outfit (btw, if you can belly dance and are attending the wedding…we should talk, LOL) but because they wanted to make sure I was okay with them wearing pants instead of a skirt or something else.  And when I say, wear what you want – it’s a party.  I get this look like I should be put into therapy.  When I say that O and I want to have a big party and not do a lot of the wedding traditions, I get more strange looks like I’m nuts.  But what about (enter odd American tradition here) and when I say – it’s okay if you like it, but we aren’t going to do it, well people think we can’t possibly get married without (said tradition entered here).

It’s sad in the era of tv shows like Bridzillas and Say Yes to the Dress, where people talk about how crazy some of these brides are, that us non-senile brides get looks of amazement.  I have had a few friends say I’m not stressed enough over this.  My mom thinks I’m not stressed enough over this.  Then to make matters worse, when people feel you aren’t stressed enough, they shoot random questions at me with the intention of making me feel like I must have forgotten something, so I should get stressed NOW!  And when I laugh it off (or in one case told the person that if it really was that dire, I’d love it if they would donate the item that they said I have to have because we simply didn’t care enough to budget for it…imagine how quickly that conversation ended ) then they say I don’t care.  It makes me sad, not stressed, that this is what it feels like to be a bride in America.

Let’s be honest people – to get married,  you need an officiant, 2 witnesses, a marriage license, and a happy couple.  That’s it.  You don’t need cake or brooms or bridesmaids or even a reception.  You don’t need to turn into a nutso bride and you don’t need assistance in going crazy if you are a sane bride.

In my time as an engaged woman (a looong time, LOL), I’ve found a few blogs that I wanted to share today.  Blogs of people who like me, are sane brides.  People who value the marriage and realize that the wedding is a party – so let’s just freaking have a good time!  Doesn’t mean that us practical sane brides don’t want it to be fun and want to look great – we just realize that well…it’s not about the little things..it’s about the biggest thing – the marriage.

Meg from A Practical Wedding

Sara from 2000 Dollar Budget Wedding

And one of my favorite all time sites, Offbeat Bride.  Because really – you gotta do you.  Everyday.  All day.

So in theory…let’s get ready to party people.  About 6 weeks until it goes down…and I hope all my lovely invited guests are ready for something that is 100% me and the future hubs, which is how it should be, yes?