It’s about the Marriage.

The funny thing about planning a wedding is that everyone thinks they should be invited and should help you plan.  Okay not everyone.  But 90% of the women around you do.  Some of them are small little things that are said in fun, but because of the 987523 large things that were said in all seriousness – it makes it hard to split the difference.  I really try not to sweat the small stuff, but in the last few weeks we have before the wedding, the annoying comments have hit an all time high.  I almost let them get to me, almost let them annoy me to no end.  Because at least 10 people have asked me about the weather, the seating, the food, or other things that I have never ever in my life thought to ask someone getting married.  Now I understand why I was told to delegate and turn my phone off the morning of the wedding – because if they can ask it, they will, lol.  It’s like when a wedding happens, people forget that it’s JUST A FREAKING PARTY!!  I actually have had a few people ask me if their outfits were okay.  Not because they wanted to wear a belly dance outfit (btw, if you can belly dance and are attending the wedding…we should talk, LOL) but because they wanted to make sure I was okay with them wearing pants instead of a skirt or something else.  And when I say, wear what you want – it’s a party.  I get this look like I should be put into therapy.  When I say that O and I want to have a big party and not do a lot of the wedding traditions, I get more strange looks like I’m nuts.  But what about (enter odd American tradition here) and when I say – it’s okay if you like it, but we aren’t going to do it, well people think we can’t possibly get married without (said tradition entered here).

It’s sad in the era of tv shows like Bridzillas and Say Yes to the Dress, where people talk about how crazy some of these brides are, that us non-senile brides get looks of amazement.  I have had a few friends say I’m not stressed enough over this.  My mom thinks I’m not stressed enough over this.  Then to make matters worse, when people feel you aren’t stressed enough, they shoot random questions at me with the intention of making me feel like I must have forgotten something, so I should get stressed NOW!  And when I laugh it off (or in one case told the person that if it really was that dire, I’d love it if they would donate the item that they said I have to have because we simply didn’t care enough to budget for it…imagine how quickly that conversation ended ) then they say I don’t care.  It makes me sad, not stressed, that this is what it feels like to be a bride in America.

Let’s be honest people – to get married,  you need an officiant, 2 witnesses, a marriage license, and a happy couple.  That’s it.  You don’t need cake or brooms or bridesmaids or even a reception.  You don’t need to turn into a nutso bride and you don’t need assistance in going crazy if you are a sane bride.

In my time as an engaged woman (a looong time, LOL), I’ve found a few blogs that I wanted to share today.  Blogs of people who like me, are sane brides.  People who value the marriage and realize that the wedding is a party – so let’s just freaking have a good time!  Doesn’t mean that us practical sane brides don’t want it to be fun and want to look great – we just realize that well…it’s not about the little things..it’s about the biggest thing – the marriage.

Meg from A Practical Wedding

Sara from 2000 Dollar Budget Wedding

And one of my favorite all time sites, Offbeat Bride.  Because really – you gotta do you.  Everyday.  All day.

So in theory…let’s get ready to party people.  About 6 weeks until it goes down…and I hope all my lovely invited guests are ready for something that is 100% me and the future hubs, which is how it should be, yes?

Advertisement